Babywearing

Tomorrow I'm teaching a babywearing class at the Breastfeeding Cafe. What is babywearing you ask? It's literally wearing your baby...in a carrier, sling, wrap etc. If you've seen me during the first year of each of my children's life, you have seen me wearing my baby. My favorite is the ring sling since it's so versatile but I also use a wrap, mei tai, and pouch.

Salem in a ring sling


Oaklen in a pouch sling


Ezril in a wrap

There are many ways to wear your baby. I was going to start explaining them all but I figured someone has already done the work for me, so here is a blog I found from a google search that does a pretty good job.

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Here is the handout that I will give at the class about ideas to make your own sling:
Make your own baby sling
Sewn Ring Sling - http://www.sleepingbaby.net/jan/Baby/floating.html
No-sew Ring Sling - http://www.sleepingbaby.net/jan/Baby/no_sew.html
No-sew Ring Sling video - http://slingyourbaby.blogspot.com/2007/07/how-to-thread-your-ring-sling.html
Where to buy the rings
• http://nestmom.com/nursing_17/Sling-Rings.htm , nestmom is located in Cottonwood Heights, Utah. You can save on shipping by picking them up directly.
• http://www.slingrings.com/
• IFA Country Store – Bull nose rings
• Home improvement stores – look in the hardware section for chain & rope accessories

Pouch Sling - http://www.sleepingbaby.net/jan/Baby/tubesling.html
Another pouch sling idea - http://www.wearyourbaby.org/Default.aspx?tabid=128

No sew wrap - http://www.wearyourbaby.org/documents/MakeAWrap.pdf

No sew ABC or Mei Tai - http://www.wearyourbaby.org/Default.aspx?tabid=118

What you can do with different yards of fabric - make a sling with as little as 2 yards of fabric: http://www.wearyourbaby.org/Default.aspx?tabid=66

Here is a list of many other links about making baby slings:
http://www.thebabywearer.com/lists/Sewing.htm

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My favorite Dr. Sears has a great article on babywearing.

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Ten Reasons to Wear your Baby http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/laura_simeon.html
by Laura Simeon, MA, MLIS

1. Wearing a baby is convenient.
When we carry a baby in a sling, we can walk around freely and not have to worry about negotiating steps, crowds or narrow aisles with a stroller. Plastic "baby buckets" and removable car seats are heavy and awkward for parents, babies often look uncomfortable, and they are kept at knee level. A sling can block out excess stimuli when breastfeeding a distractible baby, and it allows for discreet nursing in public places. A sling can also double as a changing pad, blanket, or cushion when away from home. I've found my sling especially handy when negotiating busy airports with a small child and several bags!

2. Wearing a baby promotes physical development.
When a baby rides in a sling attached to his mother, he is in tune with the rhythm of her breathing, the sound of her heartbeat, and the movements his mother makes – walking, bending, and reaching. This stimulation helps him to regulate his own physical responses, and exercises his vestibular system, which controls balance. The sling is in essence a "transitional womb" for the new baby, who has not yet learned to control his bodily functions and movements. Research has shown that premature babies who are touched and held gain weight faster and are healthier than babies who are not1. Mechanical swings and other holding devices do not provide these same benefits.

3. Babies worn in slings are happier.
Studies have shown that the more babies are held, the less they cry and fuss2. In indigenous cultures where baby-wearing is the norm, babies often cry for only a few minutes a day – in contrast to Western babies, who often cry for hours each day. Crying is exhausting for both the baby and his parents, and may cause long-term damage as the baby's developing brain is continually flooded with stress hormones.3 Babies who do not need to spend their energy on crying are calmly observing and actively learning about their environment. Baby-wearing is especially useful for colicky babies, who are far happier being worn, but placid, content babies and children will also benefit greatly from the warmth and security of being held close.

4. Baby-wearing is healthy for you!
It can be challenging for new mothers to find time to exercise, but if you carry your baby around with you most of the day or go for a brisk walk with your baby in her sling, you will enjoy the dual benefits of walking and "weightlifting". A long walk in the sling is also an excellent way to help a tired but over-stimulated child fall asleep.

5. Toddlers appreciate the security of the sling.
Slings are usually associated with infants, but they can be very useful for toddlers as well; most slings accommodate children up to 35 or 40 pounds. The world can be a scary place for toddlers, who feel more confident when they can retreat to the security of the sling when they need to do so. Toddlers often become over-stimulated, and a ride in the sling helps to soothe and comfort them before (or after!) a "melt-down" occurs. It can be very helpful in places like the zoo, aquarium, or museum, where a small child in a stroller would miss many of the exhibits.

6. Baby-wearing helps you and your baby to communicate with each other.
The more confidence we have in our parenting, the more we can relax and enjoy our children. A large part of feeling confident as a parent is the ability to read our baby's cues successfully. When we hold our baby close in a sling, we become finely attuned to his gestures and facial expressions. Many baby-wearing parents report that they have never learned to distinguish their baby's cries – because their babies are able to communicate effectively without crying! Every time a baby is able to let us know that she is hungry, bored or wet without having to cry, her trust in us is increased, her learning is enhanced, and our own confidence is reinforced. This cycle of positive interaction enhances the mutual attachment between parent and child, and makes life more enjoyable for everyone.

7. Slings are a bonding tool for fathers, grandparents, and other caregivers.
Slings are a useful tool for every adult in a baby's life. It makes me smile when I see a new father going for a walk with his baby in a sling. The baby is becoming used to his voice, heartbeat, movements and facial expressions, and the two are forging a strong attachment of their own. Fathers don't have the automatic head-start on bonding that comes with gestation, but that doesn't mean they can't make up for this once their baby is born. The same goes for babysitters, grandparents and all other caregivers. Cuddling up close in the sling is a wonderful way to get to know the baby in your life, and for the baby to get to know you!

8. Slings are a safe place for a child to be.
Instead of running loose in crowded or dangerous places, a child in a sling is held safe and secure right next to your body. Slings also provide emotional safety when needed, so that children can venture into the world and become independent at their own pace.

9. Slings are economical.
Slings cost far less than strollers, front-carriers or backpacks. Many mothers consider the sling to be one of their most useful and economical possessions. Inexpensive used slings can be found in consignment and thrift stores, and new ones can be bought for about $25 -$50 (U.S.) - not bad for an item many parents use daily for two years or more! A sling can also be sewn for the price of a length of cotton, some rings and batting; sling patterns are available.

10. Baby-wearing is fun.
Who doesn't love to cuddle a precious little baby? And when your baby is older, having her in the sling makes conversations easier and allows you to observe her reactions to the wonders of the world around her. It's also fun for baby, because when she is up at eye level, other adults notice and interact with her more. Your child will feel more a part of your life when she is in her sling, and you will find yourself becoming more and more enchanted with this special little person.

4th Annual Breastfeeding Cafe

I haven't blogged in over a month because my life has been busy this summer. One of the reasons is due to planning the 4th Annual Breastfeeding Cafe with the Utah Breastfeeding Coalition.

KUTV did a story on the breastfeeding cafe and aired it tonight on the 5:00 news. I'm in a bit of this news clip. (They spelled my name wrong but oh well. :) )

The breastfeeding cafe will be at the Salt Lake Main Library during the whole month of August. We are in the share space in the atrium area on the ground level next to the various shops. You can come and learn more about breastfeeding and/or attend classes & events. Here is the events calendar. I will be teaching two baby wearing classes, and will also be doing a children's reading circle.

This cafe is open to not only moms, but the whole family. If you're interested in coming, let me know!

August 1-31
Main Public Library
210 East 400 South, Salt Lake City
TRAX stop: Library Square

Join us in the SHARE space on the ground floor in the atrium area.
Mon-Thurs 10-7, Fri-Sat 10-6, Sun 1-5

FREE Events and Classes

• Baby Wearing
• Infant CPR
• Sign with Your Baby
• Ask a Registered Lactation Consultant
• Bluegrass Concert by The Wildflowers
• Children's Storytime
• Massage: Prenatal & Infant
• How to Protect Breastfeeding at Birth
• Ask a Registered Dietitian
• Pregnant and New Mothers Circles
• Breastfeeding 101
• Natural Birthing
• Breastfeeding Photo Contest

...and more!

Inside outside upside down

Darrell took this picture of me without me knowing. (It's not the most flattering.) I downloaded it today and had to do a double take, I look quite pregnant! I'm carrying Ezril in my ring sling and the sling is up over his head for support, his chest is toward mine. This is how I would look if he were breech and still in the womb. GEEZ!

I love my slings and baby carriers I need to do another post when I have more time to write about babywearing.

Things I forgot about newborns

It's been a while since I've had a newborn and it's amazing how quickly you forget things. As I stare at my 2 1/2 year old and 5 1/2 year old every day, I realize what's going to happen (all too quickly) to my newborn...he'll grow up! I feel like I'm cherishing these "baby moments" a little more this time around.

Things I forgot about newborns:
New baby smell - I know every mom will know what this smell is, but I never really noticed it until now. When Salem was born, seasoned moms would hold him and say "Oh I love that new baby smell!" I now will probably start saying that when I hold a newborn.

Yellow baby poop - This could be part of the new baby smell, but I strangely like the smell of yellow baby poop. Breastfed baby poop has a distinct smell that is not smelly but almost sweet. This "mustard" is difficult to remove from stained clothing but thanks to my mom and Oxyclean, I've been able to manage the stains so far. :)

Number of outfits per day - This small baby may be tiny, but he contributes his fair share of the laundry. (I give kudos to those cloth diapering mama's out there, you are doing laundry all the time!) Newborns go through a couple outfits per day due to spitting up, or diapers leaking or overflowing.

Blankets & burp clothes - You can never have too many blankets and burp clothes. I have some in almost every room in the house now and always need one.

Quivering cry - Both Salem and Oaklen had a little quiver in their cry those first few weeks. I figured that all newborns do that (and I think most still do) but Ezril has never done the quiver. A few times his little chin has moved up and down like getting the chills (yet he wasn't cold) but he never made a noise with it.

Quiet cry - As a new mom with Salem I thought his little newborn cry was loud and would bother people if he happened to cry during church or at the grocery store. One lady came up to me at the grocery store and commented on the cute little newborn cry that Salem was doing. I though "huh?" Now I realize what she meant. The older the child gets, the louder the cry. There have been times where all three of my boys are crying and the oldest child is the loudest, followed by the 2nd oldest.

Nursing all the time - I nurse Ezril on demand, which means that I don't watch the clock. I just nurse him when he needs it. That means I could be nursing him for 20 minutes then doing that same thing 10 minutes later. (By the way, I prefer to always use the term "nurse" rather than "feed" or "eat" since babies don't nurse just to eat, they need that nurturing, suckling time too.)

Sleeping all the time - When he's not nursing, he's sleeping. Adjusting to 3 children has been challenging but I think it's easier at this stage since he sleeps anytime and anywhere, rather than later when he'll be awake more.

Diapers - They're so little! We go through more diapers with newborns than with toddlers. You also use a lot more wipes.

Curled up in a ball -Newborns still want to be tight and curled up. I think it's adorable when you pick them up out of a swing, car seat, or sling and they still have their legs tucked up underneath and they "stretch" with their little arms above their head and move their head from side to side.

Squeaks - Ezril makes all sorts of noises & cute squeaks. Both when he's awake and asleep.

Cross-eyed - It's cute when newborns try to focus in on something then go cross-eyed trying to do it. Those first few times when Ezril has focused in on me has melted my heart.

I'm racking my brain thinking of other things to write and I have probably forgotten things already! Ezril is starting to smile in his sleep and a few times I've caught some half smiles while he's awake. I can't wait for those genuine smiles coming soon!

Here is a picture of my "newborn" yet he doesn't look like a newborn anymore!

First Baby Friendly Hospital in Utah

Yeah! We finally have a baby friendly hospital in Utah. Congrats to the University Hospital for achieving this breastfeeding-friendly status.

http://studio5.ksl.com/?nid=56&sid=4980132

The initiative recognizes hospitals and birth centers that have policies and practices in place to enable parents to make informed choices about how they feed and care for their babies.

University Hospital made a commitment to this initiative about four and a half years ago because we believe breastfeeding is the best for both baby and mom. The pediatricians, family practice physicians, and nurses in labor and delivery and the nursery are behind the program.

University Hospital received designation this month, making us the first hospital in the state and the 71st in the country to be recognized as a baby friendly facility.

Why Choose a Baby Friendly Hospital?

• A baby friendly hospital has taken special steps to create the best possible environment for successful breastfeeding.

• Nurses in the well baby postpartum floors, Newborn ICU, and Labor and Delivery have spent the necessary time and energy to become experts in breastfeeding.

• University Hospital wants moms to know we are here to support them when they decide to breastfeed and to make it a successful experience.

Why is breastfeeding important?

• There is quite a bit of evidence that the sooner mom and baby start breastfeeding, the longer mom will maintain it after leaving the hospital.

• We know breastfed babies have fewer ear infections and fewer problems with food allergies (especially babies with a family history of allergies). Breastfeeding also promotes better brain development.

How does a hospital implement successful breastfeeding? The Baby Friendly Initiative recommends 10 steps to successful breastfeeding.

1. Have a written breastfeeding policy that is routinely communicated to all health-care staff.

2. Train all health-care staff in skills necessary to implement this policy. Breastfeeding champions and lactation experts with the Women's and Children's Services have worked with nurse managers to get all staff trained.

3. Inform all pregnant women about the benefits and management of breastfeeding.

4. Help mothers initiate breastfeeding within an hour of birth. This helps concentrate on a very strong mother-baby emphasis. Depending on the health of the baby, this can be accomplished in most cases.

5. Show mothers how to breastfeed and maintain lactation when separated from their baby.

6. Give newborn infants only breast milk, unless medically indicated. The hospital no longer accepts free formula from formula companies. However, we do ask a mother's preference for breastfeeding or a bottle.

7. Practice "rooming in" by allowing mothers and infants to remain together 24 hours a day. University Hospital's standard of care is to have a healthy term baby in the room and never separated from his or her mother longer than one hour during a 24 hour period. University Hospital has maternal-child nurses, which means mom and baby have the same nurse.

8. Encourage breastfeeding on demand.

9. Give no artificial nipples, pacifiers, dummies, or soothers to breastfeeding babies.

10. Foster the establishment of breastfeeding support groups and refer mothers to them on discharge from the hospital.

University Hospital's success with Baby Friendly Initiative

• The initiation rate for breastfeeding has always been pretty high—91 to 94 percent—even before we started the journey of becoming a baby friendly hospital.

• What University Hospital hopes is to affect the longevity of mother's who breastfeed. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends babies are exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months.

• From data the State of Utah tracks, we know that 62 percent of babies delivered at University Hospital are still breastfed at 2-4 months, up from 50 percent in 2001.

• The Hospital hopes the education, well-trained staff, and support moms receive during their stay at University Hospital will help them be more confident and able to maintain breastfeeding after leaving the hospital.

Salem's Birth Story

Today is Salem’s 5th Birthday, Happy Birthday Salem! To commemorate his birth, here is his birth story.

Warning: this is a long post, and has a lot of information, possibly even “TMI”, read this if you’re interested in birth stories, otherwise skip it! :) This also is not only his birth story but also my labor and post-op story. It’s been 5 years and my memory is already fading but I think I’ve got most of the (too-much) detail. I had an OB/GYN for his birth and 5 years ago, I liked my doctor and I thought the birth went well. I realize now that I was ignorant about a lot of issues and just went with the standard/regular birth and trusted the medical people instead of owning my own mind and making informed decisions. Had I been informed and made my own decisions, I don’t really know what I would have done; it may have ended up being the same labor & delivery but I’ll never know. I don’t necessarily regret anything that happened. I want Salem to know that his birth was a positive experience, and I’m glad that he’s a happy healthy boy. I just want you, the reader, to not judge and base your decisions about birth based on my experience alone. Please know your facts and make your own decision, every person and every birth is unique.

Salem’s Birth Story

Here is a little background to set the mode of the birth story: I was working at Overstock.com and decided to take a leap of faith and quit work to stay home with the baby after he was born. I thought I was due August 30th, so by the first part of August I had already divvied out most of my job duties and was just doing busy work waiting out my final days. Although it was August, I didn’t have such a “terrible summer pregnancy” because I was in an air conditioned office, car & home every day.

Friends & family had thrown me showers so I felt somewhat ready to have this baby. At one shower, everyone guessed when the baby would be born, and my friend promised that she’d give the winner a prize. I participated as well, and happened to guess August 21st.

It was Wednesday August 20th and I was scheduled for my weekly OB/GYN appointment. I left work a little early to catch the last appointment of the day. Darrell met me there and after the standard OB/GYN waiting time, we went in for our check-up. The nurse did the usual thing, weighing & measuring me, including taking my blood pressure. After waiting a little longer, Dr. Gemmell came in for her 5 minute consultation.

She was concerned with my blood pressure, it was a little high. (Well what do you expect when you have to rush here straight from work, and climb a couple flights of stairs?) She had been watching my high blood pressure for the past few weeks (concerned about preeclampsia) and even had me take my blood pressure at home. At home I used my brother’s automatic blood pressure machine; it was always normal and not high. I didn’t quite believe the nurse’s blood pressure reading because a few times they took the blood pressure at the end of the appointment, after I had relaxed, and it was lower than when I had just gotten there.

Dr. Gemmell said that because my blood pressure was high and it put me at risk for preeclampsia, that I should just go ahead and induce labor. She looked at her schedule and said that we could be induced the following day. She also said “Let’s see…your due date was August 16th so...” I interupted “Uh, no I thought it was August 30th!” So still to this day I don’t know the real “due date” of Salem and I don’t know if he was “early” or “late!”

She left the room for a minute so Darrell and I could think about being induced and tell her our decision. I was in denial, could I really have this baby tomorrow? I’m not ready! This can’t be happening! Darrell, being calm yet excited, told me “Let’s have this baby tomorrow!” After a few more coaxes and realizing that I’d win the birth date guessing game I finally consented to being induced the following day on August 21st.

We talked to the doctor and we were supposed to check-in to the hospital tomorrow morning at 8:00 AM. I left the medical office and was just in awe. Oh boy, what am I in for?

I immediately went home and started getting everything ready (nesting instinct.) I even took a trip to Babies R Us to pick up a few last minute things. Darrell and I decided that we wouldn’t tell anyone that we’d be induced so that everyone would be surprised when we told them the baby was born. I talked to my mom that night and it was hard for me not to say anything, but I somehow managed to not let the cat out of the bag. (Or the baby out of the womb! :) Okay stupid pun…)

Thursday morning Darrell and I left for the hospital and I called my boss while enroute to tell her that I was going to the hospital. She hadn’t arrived to work yet, so I left a voice mail.

We checked in to the hospital and they got me gowned up, monitors on and ready to be induced. About 9:00 AM is when they gave me pitocin and my doctor came in to break my water. She said that she was going to the office and she’d check on me at the end of the day. (I thought she was kidding, of course I wouldn’t still be in labor by the end of the day. I’ll have this baby out in the next few hours for sure!)

After they broke my water, my belly looked very funny. It was no longer a basketball, it was a baby with skin on top, that’s when I knew that there was no turning back.

It didn’t take long for my mom to figure out where I was and we got a phone call. She said that she had been trying to call me at work and I wasn’t picking up the phone. After a few separate phone calls, my boss picked up my phone and answered “Heather’s phone…” My mom replied “Uh, may I speak to Heather?” Kamie told her that I hadn’t come in for work today and she didn’t know where I was. (Later I realized that Kamie is notorious for not checking her voicemail. After the baby was born I called her and she mentioned that she didn’t know where I was. I told her I had left her a voicemail and she said “Heath…you know me!” My co-workers, of course, figured out that I must be in labor and called around a couple of hospitals to find which one to send flowers to. They were beautiful, thank you!

Okay, okay, back to the birth story…

My doctor told me that I could get an epidural and any stage of my labor, so I figured the sooner the better. I got an epidural after I felt the first mild contraction. From then on, it was quite boring. The most painful thing for my whole labor ended up being the poke from the IV needle. Darrell was ready to be my “labor coach” but I really didn’t need anything so we just sat around.

My mom and John (step-dad) surprised us, and came to the hospital. I told them that there was no need for them to be here since I had the epidural and was just sitting around waiting. With my permission, they took Darrell out to lunch and stopped off at our house to pick up a few movies.

Darrell and I watched Steel Magnolias and Return to Me, two of my favorite movies. My mom stayed in the waiting room for most of the day and even had my sister Holly come after work and wait around. I felt bad because there was no need for them to sit there and wait for me.

Finally about 6:00 PM the nurses came in and said that I was progressing enough and nearing the end. My doctor came (yep, after her day at the office like she had said) and got me in position (convenient for her) to push. Darrell held one of my legs and a nurse held the other leg up in the air. A student doctor attended my birth also. At about 6:30 PM the doctor looked on the monitors for my contractions and told me when to push. I could barely feel myself pushing because of the epidural. The nurse holding my leg kept telling me “push push push push push” in a rhythmic tone that descended with each word. Darrell and I still laugh about that, and Salem loves to hear it too.

I pushed for a little while and then they gave me oxygen, it was hard work! I ended up pushing for an hour and Salem Wallace was born at 7:20 PM on August 21, 2003. 7 lbs 1 oz, 19 1/2 inches long. He came out a healthy boy and the moment I heard his little whimper I started crying because reality hit me that he was really my son! They laid him on my belly and my doctor quickly said “Dad, do you want to cut the cord?” Darrell and I didn’t really respond quickly to her question so she ended up cutting the cord. They covered him with blankets and brought him up higher to my chest for me to hold him. I was preparing myself for a newborn baby that could be blotchy with different colors etc, but he was beautiful!

After a few moments, Darrell took him to be weighed, measured and to get his foot prints (still in the same room.) I still had to push to get the placenta out and also noticed in the mirror that they were stitching me up. :( I had not known that my doctor did an episiotomy on me (both up and down) even though she had specifically said months prior that she almost never does them. (Yes I could have been the exception, but you never know. Most doctors could have waited that extra 5 minutes to let the cervix soften by itself.)

They brought Salem back over to me and my mom and family came into the room to meet him. My mom was very excited to see her first grandchild, and was especially glad that she was in Utah since she and John were currently was serving an LDS mission in Monterrey Mexico and was on “leave” for a few weeks to see the family.

I laid on the bed and the nurse helped me breastfeed Salem. He seemed to latch on okay but was quite tired. After a little bit of breastfeeding, Darrell took him to get his first bath while I ate some dinner. That food actually tasted really good, I was hungry! :)

They transferred me to the post maternity ward just as the nurses were changing shifts for the night. Darrell brought in Salem and he looked so different after his bath! His hair was so soft and he smelled good.

Darrell decided to go home for the night since he’d get a better night’s sleep in his own bed, so I said goodbye to him and then it was just me and my new baby. I didn’t really know what to do. This was my first baby plus I was the youngest child and didn’t really grow up being around too many babies, let alone a newborn.

Being the new naïve mom, I checked on him as he made every whimper. I even raised my bed as high as I could to stare at him eye-to-eye since his little bassinet was high for my bed. One nurse assistant came in to check my vitals and was shocked to see my bed so high and lowered my bed. An hour went by and I expected that the nurses would come in and tell me what to do or at least check in on me since I still had my IV. (This was the first time staying overnight in a hospital.) I pressed the nurse call and finally someone answered through the speaker. I said “Am I supposed to nurse my baby now?” She said “Yes, you can do that, go ahead.” So, I got Salem out of his little swaddling blankets and tried to nurse him by myself and it wasn’t working. He was just too tired & sleepy. I was getting frustrated that my baby would not latch-on and the nurses didn’t come in to help me. I was a post-partum emotional wreck and after trying numerous times to call the nurses I ended up calling Darrell at midnight to make him come back to the hospital to help me. I figured that he would come faster than the nurses. He was asleep and was very drowsy on the phone; he was trying to convince me that he didn’t need to come and that the nurses would be there shortly. Just as I was saying goodbye to him, the nurse finally came in.

After that , things started getting better. The nurses understood that they had an emotional first-time mom and a very sleepy baby that would not breastfeed. They tried many times to help Salem latch on to the breast, we even got him down to his diaper so that the coldness would wake him up a little. No budge. This little boy was tired and he wasn’t going to wake for anyone! :) Now I realize that his sleepiness was probably an effect of the epidural. I had the epidural way too soon and for way too long. (I didn’t think about the effects of an epidural on the postpartum baby when I had planned on an epidural months prior. My doctor also didn’t tell me any warnings or reasons behind waiting for a certain stage in the labor to administer the drug.)

Long story short, (though this is still quite long.) The next morning I had the hospital’s lactation consultatnt help me. We still couldn’t get him to wake up very much or latch on very well. She gave me an SNS and we finger fed him after trying to latch him on each time. The finger feeding was okay since it still helped him get used to skin to skin contact, but we still needed to get him nursing.

Many people came to see Salem on Friday and welcome him into the world. I was glad to see everyone. My doctor came to check on me and was surprised when she found out that I still had my IV until 8:00 AM the next day. The nurses were supposed to take it out when I got to the post maternity room. The student doctor came to visit and she said thank you for letting her attend the birth. She said it was great and that Dr. Gemmell was amazing under the circumstances. (Huh? What circumstances? Was this not a normal birth?)

We were scheduled to leave the hospital Saturday morning and by that time nursing still was not established. As a last resort, the lactation consultant gave me a nipple shield to use but warned me not to rely on it. The nipple shield seemed to do the trick. He was latching on, and actually nursing for a few minutes before he’d fall asleep.

We drove home with now three in our family. We put Salem in his crib and I went to bed. We had visitors that day, I was asleep for some of them and wasn’t woken up and I was awake for others. The next day (Sunday) Darrell wanted to take Salem to church with him and let me rest but I didn’t want Darrell to get all the glory :) I wanted to see the people’s faces when they first saw Salem too. So, our little family went to church at 9:00 AM. Everyone was happy yet shocked to see us there. I felt okay just as long as I was sitting but later I realized that I “over did it” those first few days at home. On Monday we visited both Darrell’s and my employer to show off Salem. That week Darrell stayed home with us to help and the next week Darrell was back at work and mom had also gone back to Mexico. Being a first-time stay-at-home mom was challenging and emotional but I loved Salem very much and was glad for the opportunity.

The nursing situation was still quite challenging. The first few days home I tried using the SNS for finger feeding as well as attaching it to the breast but it was just messy and frustrating. I was engorged on day 3 and ended up renting a hospital-grade pump to help establish my milk supply. I started using the nipple shield more and more and that seemed to be the best solution. I was very happy that I was breastfeeding him but I hated relying on the nipple shield. One time I was away from home and forgot the shield so I had to go home to nurse him. I was also told [wrong] information that the nipple shields were not good and that they decrease your milk supply. I learned later that it was a myth because 30 years ago nipple shields were made differently and not very good, but today they were made with silicone and shaped appropriately so they were not bad to use. The hardest part was weaning him from the shield. I’d try to latch him on then quickly yank it out but that turned into a mess.

I talked to a La Leche League leader and also went to a local La Leche League meetings. She suggested that I cut the shield every few days so that it gets smaller and smaller eventually small enough to just be my nipple and not the shield. The trick worked! After 6 long weeks, one night Salem was using the shield and it fell off and he sleepily latched on! Yeah! The next morning we were completely nursing and I was a happy camper. I even emailed my mom (on her mission) and said “I can see clearly now the rain is gone!”

I am thankful for the opportunity to mother Salem. I was the classic example of a naive first-time mom. And I hope that you have learned something from my experience. I shared a little more than just the birth story because a lot of times some of the detail doesn’t get known and then another mom will be having a similar experience thinking “I’m all alone!”

Salem, happy birthday! I love you to infinity!

I have boys!

Both times when the person giving the ultrasound told me that I was having a boy it didn't really phase me. I thought "oh that will be just fine."

Well...now that they are 2 and 4 1/2 I'm now realizing that I HAVE BOYS! :) I'm going to have little boys running around, pouncing, tumbling, fighting, crashing, yelling, doing sound effects, being rough, and just being little boys! Then...I'm going to have teenage boys, I don't even want to think of what's in store for me then! :)

It was surreal when I went to Salem's first teeball game. I am used to going to dance practices and other girlie stuff. I never had gone to a ball practice. I sat there thinking "I have boys! Oh my goodness, what am I going to do?"

I guess the best thing I can do is just LOVE THEM, sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride! :)

Oaklen's Birth Story

Today is Oaklen's birthday, he's 2 yrs old!

My friend Catey posts her birth stories on her blog when it's her child's birthday and I like that idea so I'm going to do it too! Warning: this is a long post, and has a lot of information, possibly even “TMI”, read this if you’re interested in birth stories, otherwise skip it! :)

Oaklen's Birth Story
First of all you'll need a little background. When I was pregnant with Oaklen (Okay Darrell, now is your time to chime in and say "you can't be pregnant with..."), I was working at Overstock.com.

My due date was June 9th and I planned on working through the end of May and begin working from home June 1st. That way I wouldn't go into labor with all my worried co-workers. :) Every day I'd leave work, my friends would wonder if I'd be back the next day; then when I arrived bright and early the following day, they'd all take a sigh (of relief since they didn't want me to leave!) For some co-workers this was their first experience dealing with a pregnancy so it was quite interesting. They watched my belly (and my nose) get bigger, I let them touch my stomach (don't listen to that HR department), they wondered "what on earth is she eating now?", they helped me think of names, and they placed bets to see if the baby was a boy or a girl.

Since it was my second boy, there was no need to throw me a shower but a bunch of my co-workers wanted to have a party/shower anyway. They talked to me and I decided to schedule it for Wednesday May 31. Monday would be the Memorial Day holiday and Tuesday didn't work since some would still be on vacation so we decided on Wednesday May 31 for the shower.

I went to work on Tuesday May 30 and had a great work day. For some reason, I had a feeling that I should bring home the laptop and a few work supplies "just in case." I figured I would just bring them back the next day.

I got home and Darrell was there with Salem, Candace, and Eli. Candace & Eli had come over to do some laundry at our house (since we offered) and then stayed to eat good ol' frozen burritos with us for dinner. I wasn't really feeling too well, but didn't really do much about it since my friends were over, I just put my head on the table and let my belly hang over and that seemed to help my discomfort. (Little did I know that those were probably mild contractions!)

After we ate, (about 6:30 PM) Salem wanted to go show Candace & Eli his new bedroom upstairs. By the time I got to the top of the stairs, I felt a rush, and then suddenly REALLY needed to go to the bathroom. I ran to the bathroom and sat on the toilet and thought that I “didn’t make it.” I thought that it was strange since that hasn’t really happened to me before. Then I realized “oh, maybe that was my water breaking!” I didn’t want to believe it; I wanted to fake myself out of it. Was this it? Was I really going into labor? ( I hadn’t experienced these things on my previous pregnancy since I was induced and had an epidural so I felt like I never had a real “labor” experience, I didn’t even know what a contraction felt like.)

After I realized what might be happening, I yelled “Um Darrell, will you come here for minute?” Darrell came in and I sheepishly told him that I thought my water had broken. Darrell: “What? Can’t you tell if you’re water broke or not?” Heather: “Well I don’t know… it’s weird.” Darrell: “Well what else could it be? You’re 9 months pregnant and it’s bound to happen!” So, Darrell finally convinced me that I was in labor. While I was changing into different pants, Darrell told Candace & Eli that I was in labor. I came out of my room and looked at Candace with a worried, unbelieving face and said “I guess this is it!” They collected their laundry and said goodbye and good luck. (One a side note, it’s funny that they were there when I went into labor because they were also there the night that I found out that I was pregnant. We had taken a home pregnancy test that evening and they came over 30 minutes later and Darrell, of course, had to tell them!)

I called my mom and asked her what “water breaking” feels like and she said that yes I had probably broken my water. I called my midwife and told her what had happened. She said that she happened to be at the office (even though she took the day off) and to come in and get checked to verify that it truly was amniotic fluid. I then called my mom back to have her meet us there so she could take Salem home with her if needed.

We arrived at the birth center and Rebecca, my midwife, verified that it was amniotic fluid and I was in labor. She was excited of course, but the week prior, she told me that I "couldn't" go into labor on May 30 or May 31 since she paid for this midwife conference that she was going to attend and jokingly said that all of her patients weren't supposed to go in labor then. :) I felt bad that I was going to disrupt her non-refundable conference.

I still wasn't really feeling any contractions but since my water broke Rebecca said that if I don't have the baby within 24 hours that I'd have to be transferred to the hospital. She set me up on the fetal monitoring system for just a while to track my labor. She had to tell me that I was having a contraction! I thought "Oh, is that was they feel like?" I was thinking more about the juice that she gave me and my family than my contractions.

It was about 7:30 PM and we decided to head home to labor there and then call Rebecca when things started to pick up. (I didn't expect to call her until late morning the next day.)

My mom followed us home so that she could get Salem's overnight bag. I kissed Salem & my mom goodbye about 9:00 PM and then it was just Darrell, me, and my belly that was starting to look like a baby with a bunch of skin over it.

Darrell and I knelt together and said a prayer, and then I headed upstairs to "rest" while Darrell finished cleaning up the kitchen and living room. (He had the nesting instinct too!)

I knew that rest was a good thing that laboring women needed so I went straight to bed and closed my eyes to sleep. I thought that I could sleep through the contractions. I stayed lying down in the bed for a few of the first contractions but they were distracting enough that I couldn’t sleep. I then started to sit up when I had a contraction they lay back down (on my side) after it was over. The contractions were then coming closer & closer together so I remained sitting up. I instinctively started to rock my body from side-to-side and just breathe deeply when I had a contraction. (Later I likened that to when the Polynesians rock/sway side-to-side after they have eaten a big meal to help them digest their food. If it works for them, it’s got to work for helping the baby get in place too.)

The contractions were getting to a point that I no longer wanted to do it by myself and wished that Darrell would finish cleaning and come upstairs to help me. Luckily he must have heard my unsolicited wish and came upstairs in a timely manner.
It was about 11:00 PM by then and Darrell was excited that the contractions were happening. We sat on the bed together, he behind me, and I grabbed his hand whenever I started to feel a contraction. I didn’t really want to talk so the only way he knew I was contracting was when I squeezed his hand. He noticed that they were getting pretty close together so he grabbed a pen & paper to time the contractions. After a short while, I wanted him to stop writing them down and to focus on me instead of the paper. He kept telling me that these contractions were quite close and that we should call Rebecca. I was still faking myself out of it and thought that we still had a lot of time to go.

I decided that I should try to get up and go to the bathroom. As I was getting up, I had another contraction. Darrell was quickly right there, and got up so quickly that he stepped on the garbage can next to the bed and smashed a hole in it. (To this day, I haven’t gotten a new garbage can because it still works and does the job, plus it’s a fun memory every time I look at it.)

Anyway, I made it to the bathroom and after a few more contractions; I had the urge to push. Darrell ran to get the phone to call Rebecca. While he was dashing for the phone, I let out a yell for the first time and it felt good to use my vocals. I remember learning that when you think it’s getting too hard to manage, that it was almost over. I was now hoping that this was “it,” though I was still preparing myself for possibly more hours of intense labor.

Darrell arrived back upstairs with Rebecca on the phone. By now it was almost 12:00 midnight. I wasn’t in the mood to talk on the phone but Darrell wanted me to talk to her. I just yelled from a distance and said “I’m pushing!” I heard Rebecca say “Heather, don’t push, don’t push!” She wanted me to wait until we arrived at the birth center so she could see if I really was ready to push.

We got off the phone and collected our things to go to the birth center. It took me a while to get from my bedroom all the way to the car in the garage. I kept crossing my legs, and holding my hand down there as I walked. I’m sure that the walking helped Oaklen get down into place.

We hopped on the freeway and went a little over the speed limit but not too much. When we exited the freeway and traveled down the street to the birth center, we wanted to go faster but there was a slow car in front of us. It’s quite ironic that the one time that we could warrant breaking the speed limit, we couldn’t because there was a slow car in front of us, at 12:15 in the morning!

We arrived at the birth center and Rebecca was already there. The nurse/owner, Susan, arrived shortly after. Months earlier, I had chosen “my room.” I chose the ivy room since the bed looked like our bed at home and there was a nice big tub. We went in the room and Rebecca was already starting to fill the bathtub. I started taking off my clothes to prepare for the bath and Rebecca looked down there and said “I see a head!” Heather: “Good!” Rebecca: “Do you want to push?” Heather: “YES!” They stopped filling up the tub and drained it since I was ready to push. I got on the bed and laid on my left side to push. It felt the most comfortable.

Meanwhile Darrell and I realized that we forgot the camera! I told him to call my mom to go get the camera. She woke up and left Salem sound asleep with John (my step-dad) and came to the birth center. She gave us her brand new digital camera still in the box and wanted us to use that one. I told her that I’d prefer to use our camera so we gave her our keys for her to go to our house to get it. She left for our house, I was pushing, and Darrell was fiddling with the new camera trying to see if he could get it charged. I quickly told him to forget about the camera, and to just come on the bed and be with me. (Throughout the whole labor I was proud of myself that I didn’t get too ornery and start yelling at people. I anticipated that I’d do that. You’ll have to ask Darrell for sure if I was as nice as I think I was, but I thought I did pretty well.)

I didn’t count how many pushes that I did, it was more than just a few but it wasn’t an hour like last time. Rebecca and Susan were really great and patient. They knew just the thing I needed at every moment. Darrell also was a great labor coach, I mainly just needed him beside me for moral support and to hold my hand or stroke my hair.

Oaklen officially arrived at 1:10 AM on Wednesday May 31, 2006, less than an hour from the time that I arrived at the birth center. My mom happened to come in with the camera just after Oaklen was born so we were able to get some “right-after” pictures.

The moment Oaklen was born, Rebecca laid him on my chest & belly, skin to skin, and draped blankets around the both of us. He stayed on my belly for a while then he nursed for even longer. My mom said congratulations and then headed home to finish her sleep. Darrell and I sat on the bed and just stared at our new son. After about an hour Darrell finally got to hold him and weigh & measure him while I got up and took a shower. Oaklen was 7 lbs, 10 oz and 20 inches long. After the shower, I came back to the bed and slept/rested with Oaklen by my side for the remainder of the night. Darrell tried to sleep there on the bed too, but since he has a hard time sleeping anywhere except his own bed, he decided to get up and go to another room to watch a movie. Rebecca went home to sleep and Susan stayed there and snored in the next room, loud enough that Darrell could hear it.

We got up about 7:00 AM. I called my mom to tell her to bring Salem to meet Oaklen. Rebecca came about 8:00 AM and gave me an exam to make sure everything was okay. She and I were happy that she could still make her conference that she paid to attend that day. :)

My mom came with Salem and he got to meet his new brother. He was very happy and gave us a rose from Grandma’s garden. I got myself and Oaklen dressed and our family of now 4 headed home. We arrived home about 9:45 AM. It was great to be home with the comforts of my own house.

Many people came to visit that day and by the end of the day, I was quite tired! My co-workers still threw me the shower even though I wasn’t there. They even brought over the presents that evening. Thanks!

Oaklen’s birth story will be an experience that I’ll never forget. It was amazing and there is nothing that I would have done differently!

Happy Birthday Oaklen, I love you!

Successful Mothering Convention

I was in charge of a booth at the Successful Mothering Convention last Saturday. The Utah Breastfeeding Coalition sponsored a breastfeeding nook for nursing moms. I sat there for a few hours and gave out information about breastfeeding. I was able to listen to a couple different speakers, and also go look at the other booths.

I didn't stop at every booth, but there were a few noteworthy places, and I thought I'd type their web addresses, etc. for both my good as well as for you. Enjoy!

Utah Breastfeeding Coalition
(This was my booth, I'm the chairperson for the Promotions & Marketing Committee.)
www.utahbreastfeeding.org

Utah Birth Network
They're going to start screening The Business of Being Born at local libraries.
Parenting support groups
Bellycasting
www.utahbirth.net

Noodlesoup
Helping you build strong families
www.noodlesoup.com

Children's Service Society of Utah
Child Care Resource & Referral ~ Metro
Your child care connection
Free child care referrals online
www.css.utah.org

Learn with Shamu
There was a motivational speaker named Laura Surovik. Her topic was "The power of positive training techniques used to train Seaworld's famous killer whale, Shamu!"

Shamu's Life Balance HELPRS
H Husbandry & Rest
E Exercise
L Learning
P Play
R Relationship
S Shows
www.learnwithshamu.com

Morsels of Wisdom
There was a speaker named Vivian Cline. Her topic was "Morsels of Wisdom"
She spoke about a book called Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnach, it has a little quote for each day.
She also talked about a book called The Ultimate Career by Daryl Hoole, the website is:
www.theartofhomemaking.com

Wasatch Woman
Magazine
http://www.wasatchwoman.com/

American Mother's Inc.
Stregthening the Moral and Spiritual Foundatoins of the Family and Home
www.americanmothers.org
www.amiutah.org

Utah Home Education Association
When it comes to education, there's no place like home.
www.uhea.org

The Lighted Candle Society
Awaken our fellow citizens to the ultimate dangers of pornography
www.lightedcandle.org
www.familyfragments.com
www.herstorylives.com

UCan
Utah Cancer Action Network
www.ucan.cc

Parents as Teachers
Increase parent knowledge of early childhood development and improve parenting practices
Provide early detection of developmental delays and health issues
Prevent child abuse and neglect
Increase children's school readiness and school success
www.patnc.org

One World Everybody Eats
Fresh organic vegetarian and meat dishes
www.oneworldeverybodyeats.org

Just Between Friends
Children's consignment shop
You get 70% of the sale of your clothes & items
www.jbfsale.com

Utah All Kids Sale
Children's consignment shop
You get 70%-80% of the sale of your clothes & items
www.utahallkidssale.com

Yoga Monkeys
Yoga for little minds, bodies & hearts!
Mom & tot classes available
www.utahyogamonkeys.com

See abc's
Develops reading skills 2-10 times faster
www.seeabcs.com

ATI Grocery
This guy showed how he can get groceries for cheap, but I like pinchingyourpennies.com better. He said that you have to pay to get his info. LAME!
www.atigrocery.com/1

Internet Keep Safe Coalition
Protect your child from internet danger
www.ikeepsafe.org

Mom-ease
A non-profit making it wasy for families to live healthy, sustainable lifestyles
www.momease.info